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Facing the fears of lizards and mosquitos.

Written on: Wednesday January 23rd, 2008

A journal entry from: World Tour 2008

  I've always been a bit afraid of insects. I have never liked ants, spiders, bees, mosquitos or anything like that. But since I'm gonna travel around south east asia I'm really going to have to learn to cope with that. In Bangkok I was afraid of everything new too, was thinking if mosquitos could come into the room, because I wouldn't know what kind of diseases they have. But after a couple of days that was OK. I was comfortable in Bangkok, and could really have stayed longer there in my guesthouse. But I was tired of all the traffic, all the hawkers (people shouting after you to sell stuff, get you into restaurant, massage, taxi-ride to prostitutes, street-food). So I decided to move on to get some beach life.

   The closest big island to Bangkok is Ko Samet, it only took 3-4 hours to get here including bus-boat. Anyway in the end I ended up choosing a simple bungalow, not a closed one. Between the ceiling and the wall was big holes to let air flow through. And animals...
  But I had a big mosquito net around the bed. Even though it seemed t not be in the best shape. So first face in facing fear, was to lie down in the bed watching the mosquito net for all the holes they could get into. I guess I'm really paranoid sometimes... But this island had malaria some years ago, but people say that it's gone now I think. Even though, maybe dengue fever? Well after 20 minutes it was getting too warm to be in bed afraid of all the insects on the island so I had to take a shower. There I saw the first lizards on the ceiling, but I took the shower, afraid of the lizards.
  Then back to the room, and to the restaurant. There when my meal came in I was attacked by a thousand flies. So I ate really fast constantly waving the flies away from my food. Second bad insect experience. And after a couple of hours I realised that food had made my sick in the stomach at last. But it took 20 days before it came! But I have got medicine so it's ok now.
   AFter sitting on the beautiful beach for really long just taking a break from all the fears, reading, relaxing, trying out the nice water, watching the sunset. I just sat there and enjoyed the freedom of being able to do nothing for a couple of hours with waves silently crashing onto the beach. The sunset was nice and they played some nice thai music in the restaurant behind me. Comfortably warm. I had a nice book to read about a guy cycling around the world.
   First reward that day. After all the fears and loneliness comes happiness.

   Finally I went back the room to change for evening clothes. And it was getting dark, so I lit the lamp in my room. And whoops came 50 mosquitoes to fly around the lamp. And a couple of lizards was crawling around in the ceiling, suddenly one dropped down on the floor. Well this was the highlight of panicing about insects. I tried to change clothes fast and put more mosquito repellent on. There I decided to change bungalow to a nicer one.

In the night I had a nice time, first watching two movies in the guesthouse than talking with people in the bar and playing some pool. So I had a really great time again. Fear of going back to the bungalow I tried to stay awake. But finally I just went to bed. And I found that there was nog mosquitos or lizards in my bungalow this time. But I didn't lit the lamp... And under the mosquito net it was really clean from insects, no mosquitoes. Comfortable bed, and really nice and cool because of the holes in the bungalow to let air flow through. So I ended up enjoying the night in the bungalow. A nice experience.

But this morning I changed anyway to a cheaper bungalow who has toilet and shower inside. Because I don't like waking up at night, getting dressed walking all the way to the bathrooms. Plus there were lizards and mosquitos there too =)

So now I think I got a bungalow without animals, except the spiders in the bathroom...

But I also think I'm a bit less afraid of this island now. And I hope that it will continue like this. Facing fears to let the fears go and be able to feel comfortable among insects. I hope!

Anyway it feels better today. And the beach is really amazing. And I like how I can just relax all day here. Nothing special I have to do. Just eat, sleep, relax no the beach, meet people.
  I guess I will be staying here in Ko Samet til Sunday I heard that a lot of thai people come from BAngkok every weekend for vacation and it would be interesting to meet more local people. Otherwise there are mostly swedish people here...


From Benjamin on Jan 28th, 2008

Tja, du fa komma hit till Krabi Au Nang sa vi far snacka lite!!